I have night terrors. In short, I "wake up" and see things and I scream Bloody Goddamn Murder. The most traumatic hallucinations have caused me to attempt to escape by trying to jump out a window. The only good thing about having them all my life is that by now I can usually wade through the hallucinatory horror and convince myself that the shit I am seeing isn't real. One of the scariest incidents I've ever had was the night I started reading Truman Capote's real life crime "novel" In Cold Blood. I fell asleep after devouring the first 1/4 of the book and "woke up" with one of the murderers sitting next to my bed. Needless to say I screamed and pleaded and all the stuff one does when they believe their live is about to end. Sometimes, I scream until my throat feels like it is going to bleed. It's crazy, absolute bonkers, and it obviously ruins the night and the next day and throws off my sleep for days and days to come.
Last night I had a terror. Someone tall walked into my room and when I "realized" it wasn't Jon I freaked, throwing back the covers and telling tall creature to get the fuck out. Then I actually woke up and went downstairs to get something to drink and to see if Jon heard me. It was 10:20 and Jon was none the wiser, with earbuds in watching netflix no the futon in the study.
So yeah, I took it easy on myself. I will return to my glorious mornings when I can. Tomorrow.
Yuck:
Guy on the top. Scary as all Hell. Capote wrote like a mofo. I will never again pick up that book.
I'm
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